Weigh-In & Planning

I wish we could talk about this over coffee. (Sigh). I weighed in yesterday at 203. It's kind of weird to think about how long ago it was that I was writing about making it into "Onederland." I vowed to never go back. Never say never, huh?

There is a verse of scripture from the book of James: But above all, my brothers, do not swear, either by heaven or by earth or by any other oath, but let your “yes” be yes and your “no” be no, so that you may not fall under condemnation. (James 5:12 ESV) 

Interestingly, the few verses before this instruct believers to be patient, establish our hearts before the Lord,  not grumble, to be steadfast... compassionate... merciful. I have lost patience many times with this process. Usually when I realize I'm not in control or when things aren't going the way I think they should be. Then I think that if I make new promises, bigger vows that will somehow put me back in control. But really it just sets me up for condemnation--from myself.

How many of us have condemned ourselves for not keeping our vows, for not reaching the lofty goals that we set? And then what happens? Well, I get grouchy. A real pain in the butt, I tell ya. I might even begin to compare myself to others and look for anything in someone else that could make me feel better about me. Enter the grumbling. Exit mercy and compassion. It's such an ugly cycle.

But above all, says James, just let your yes be yes. And your no be no. Just do what you know is right. Don't talk about it all day and night--of which I am guilty--but just do it. Just DO IT. If we get this part right, then everything else sort of falls into place. We are content, free to think of ourselves much, much less. Now that's the way to truly live.

So I know what to do. And I know that if I do what I know I need to do the result is generally really good. So what's the problem?

 I think the problem is that there is an oft overlooked key element between the recognition of what must be done and the doing of what must be done. And that, my friends, we call planning. These are some things that I know I must PLAN for or they will not happen in a good way:

*Weekly meal & snack planning
*Semi-weekly Grocery Store trip
*Work-outs
*Quiet/Bible study time
*Prayer time
*House-cleaning

Know what to do > Make plans to do it > Do it >Keep doing it, steadfastly

Need breakfast plans? Here's a great idea!

"Many good things do not happen in our lives for the simple lack of planning." John Piper

New Day's Resolutions

I don't think there is anything at all wrong with resolutions. To resolve to do a thing is perfectly respectable and people do it successfully all the time. But one thing I've observed is that it is much more easy, fun and exciting to make a resolution than it is to keep it.

At the heart of most resolution making, I believe, is the hope that this time we will find a solution. To whatever things we struggle with, whatever bothers us about ourselves, whatever is wrong with us...don't we just want to be fixed?

And so we run the risk, with resolution making, of finding out that in fact there is no amount of resolve in all of the world to fix ourselves...to finally, once and for all, correct the problem of us. This fact has found me. But grace has found me more.

I find myself wanting more than ever to resolve to work hard and devote myself fully to each day that will lie before me in the coming year. I've never been able to handle a collective 365. Perhaps just one?

First resolution of many in 2013--laundry. Lots of laundry.

Happy New Year, dear friends!

"The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time." Abraham Lincoln

News: I Cooked Something

These are the fabulous potatoes I made for lunch today. A pretty healthy (and easy!) way to get a fried potato fix. You boil some small potatoes (leave them whole) for about 30 minutes. The smallest ones worked best, between the size of a tennis ball and a ping pong ball. When a fork goes in easily, remove the potatoes and dry them off on a towel. Like this:

Then you put them on a pan lined with foil and parchment paper. I sprayed it with olive oil. Then flatten each potato with  a spatula to about 1/2 in. It's okay if they come apart some. I just formed them back into circles. Drizzle with olive oil and a liberal amount of salt and pepper. You could probably be more adventurous with the spices but I wanted simple. Bake at 450 for about 30 minutes until the tops and edges are golden and crispy. I served with tilapia and a salad. Justin said I outdid myself on lunch today. I said, "Yeah, simply by cooking something, I outdid myself." That's kind of sad. It has been awhile. But I'll take the compliment! It was pretty delicious, if I do say so myself.

I had an enjoyable trip to the market yesterday. The fridge got cleaned out and only healthy stuff is in there now. Whoo-hoo!

I found these pretty ceramic refrigerator/microwaveable storage bowls at Marshall's. I LOVE them! I hate the plastic storage containers because I always have lids that don't match containers and they just clutter everything up. Plus I think they are bad for you. And the earth. Anyway, I usually leave the leftovers in them forever and then when I finally clean out the fridge I end up tossing the containers rather than wash them. LAZY! But I will never throw these beauties away.

I feel like I'm getting the food part under control. Now for the motivation to get outside and exercise! It seems to be there but it is so dang cold! I got all dressed up, had earbuds and everything to go for a walk today and one step outside changed my mind. I am praying for some slightly warmer, less windier days this week so I can get moving while it seems somewhat appealing. (Yes, I could do some things inside but I don't like to.) Want to try jogging a mile 3 days. Maybe walk some other days. It's a start. I am dreaming of another half marathon...but mustn't get ahead of myself. We'll see what progress the week brings.

This photo kind of sums up our day. Loved it.

Weigh-in tomorrow.

Kindred Spirits

Kindred spirits aren't so scarce as I used to think. It's splendid to find out there are so many of them in the world. -Anne of Green Gables

I am touched by all the supportive comments from my blog post last night. I am overwhelmed by the way God places people in our lives to uplift and encourage. How many of us are in the same boat! We have struggled for so, so long. It takes courage to keep going. I pleaded with God for that courage and new answers for us all. For Him to show us a different way and to give us strength to go there. I believe He will answer that prayer.

I won't pretend that I am strong, as if suddenly I'm ready to tackle this again. I'm not. I'm weak. As difficult as it may be to realize, we are unified in our weakness, not our strength. But we know that in our weakness His strength is made perfect. For all that weakness, the collective weakness of us kindred spirits, there is infinitely more strength in Christ.

That's our hope, that's our courage.

I'm excited and thankful for the opportunity to begin again, with you all. Humbled by your love and solidarity.

Real fat, again.

Okay, time's up. I've got to get back to business. I've been trying since September. Well, actually I've been talking since September. A lot of talk, very little action.

I have gained about 30 pounds over the past year. None of my clothes fit. I'm very irritable. I don't feel good, period. The point has been proven that I can't just haphazardly address my diet and activity. There is a certain way that things must be done, certain boundaries that must be in place for me to stay healthy. If it took me gaining 30 lbs to know that beyond a shadow of a doubt, then so be it. I'm ready to return to the way of life that brought me so much joy!

I thought long and hard about whether or not I would go back to writing this blog regularly. It got to the point where I felt like there was nothing new for me to write about. Occasionally it is a really difficult thing to do. I tend to become obsessive with it, get my feelings hurt. I make a fool of myself (Do you know that when you "Google" my name about one million pictures of me standing in front of a mirror appear!? Ugh.) I wonder if I am missing something really big and everything I write about is folly.

But, in the end I decided that the blog is just a part of the deal for me. There are new things for me to be REAL about, I just gotta hang in here long enough to see what they are. And I will have to be okay with the possibility likelihood of futility.