March 4, 2014

A Nail-Biter

Took a counseling course a couple years ago and one of the projects was a "sin" project. Fun times. I had to write a whole paper that was focused specially on a personal sin. It was actually very liberating believe it or not.

We were instructed to focus on something we might consider "not a big deal," something as seemingly insignificant as say...biting your nails.

Huh? Biting nails is a sin? 

Well not exactly, but the roots of why a person might bite their nails can reveal deeper sin struggles. I did not use that for my project but it has been something I think about a lot. Because I have been biting my nails for as long as I can remember.

When do I bite my nails? Why?

When I am afraid, overwhelmed, worried. I usually don't even realize Im doing it until one starts bleeding.  Is there any connection between putting nails in my mouth and putting food in my mouth when I am afraid, overwhelmed, worried? I imagine there is. 

Will-power has never been a sustainable method for me to change things like these. Hot pepper juice can't even keep my nails out of my mouth! The hope of a cute bikini bod can't even make me eat less. There is no man-made way or incentive for me to be made whole.

But turning to The Sustainer, the God who holds me...for peace, comfort and wisdom will--in the long run--change me. Change everything about me, right down to the state of my fingernails.

The LORD is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. And those who know your name put their trust in you, for you, O LORD, have not forsaken those who seek you. Psalm 9:9-10

For in him all the fullness of God was pleased to dwell, through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether on earth or in heaven, making peace by the blood of his cross. Col 1:19-20

I have not had finger nails in my mouth for over a month. Also down 15 lbs since Jan. Thx Jesus.