February 3, 2011

My Man Asked for CFS

Chicken-fried Steak. It was his birthday and he wanted some. I haven't cooked it in over a year. Wanna know why? CFS is a tenderized cut of meat called cube steak. In order to "chicken fry" it you dip it in flour and then an egg/milk mixture, then back into flour and then you fry it in vegetable oil. It is often served with gravy and other fattening sides such as mashed potatoes (and they aren't mixed with cauliflower or made with chicken broth). Probably one of the top ten most unhealthy meals ever. But ohhhh, is it good! If I had to choose a last meal--this would be it.

Confession: I ate Chicken-fried steak tonight. It has been over a year since I have made or eaten CFS. It was really fine. I had two small pieces but I hadn't had much protein or fat for the day. I had some whole grain brown rice and green beans to go with it. I passed on the homemade, to-die-for chocolate pie and banana pudding made by my mother-in-law. I wasn't stressed about what I would or wouldn't eat. I didn't have to make a big deal out of not having dessert. It was just a normal dinner only we were celebrating my love. He was definitely happy and he deserved whatever meal he wanted today.

Only recently did it dawn on me that this man never, not once, has ever said a thing about my weight. Nothing negative about my body, my bad habits, lack of good habits, my poor attitude...nothing...ever. That really blows my mind. I know when we married we made a commitment to one another and it was for better or worse and in good and bad and all that. But over the past 9 years I have really put him to the test. And can I just tell you? He passed.

What makes me feel really horrible (and like a total jerk) is when I think about how I would have reacted if he had been the one to let himself go. I would have been nagging and complaining non-stop for 9 years. I would have been impatient and rude. I would have been...heck, I would have been embarrassed. Resentment, anyone? Let's just say it would NOT have been pretty!

Just keepin' it real...

You know what this is? This is another one of the copious, and perhaps the most cherished example of God's grace in my life. As good a guy as he is, the grace of God is the only explanation for the unabashed love Justin has always shown me. He could not have done that in his own flesh. There's no way.

I have been undeservedly, unconditionally and relentlessly loved by this man. Even in my weaknesses, he has always accepted me. Not only has he accepted me--he has pursued me.

Why on earth? I have no idea, but it kinda makes that whole "submission" thing an easier pill to swallow ;)

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. Ephesians 5:21-25

Happy 30th Justin! I promise to spend the next 30 holding up my end of the deal.

All my love,


Verity Vaudeville said...

This is wonderful :) Putting yourself on the line for your loved one. How amazing that weight has never been an issue for him, that he loved you regardless, there's not many people who can say that. I should know. I bet the steak tasted all the greater for the fact you've got control down to a t. Knowing you could have some, and then walk away. That really gives you a feeling of strength and reassurance.

Well done, lovey, I bet he had the best birthday :)

Virginia said...

Amen to that girlfriend Amen to that - the men in our lives can be so utterly amazing and it sometimes takes that step back to appreciate it! Mine like yours never judges or comments on my weight he simply encourages as I make my way back to where I want to be and why because he only ever sees the real me and that has nothing to do with the way I look but it has everything to do with my heart and soul! Here's to celebrating quite simply AMAZING HUSBANDS!



Laura said...

Wow, you are right. A true in flesh example of our savior's love. Thank you for the reminder I think my hubby needs a little more appreciation in this area!

{Absolutely, Positively} Josie said...

God has blessed you abundantly, Keelie, and you really pay it forward.

i confess that i made cfs (and banana pudding) this past week. past as in, moving on!

God bless you and your family.


Lucy K said...

Wow I love this post! He sounds like my husband. We are both very lucky women Keelie! I had not thought about what I would have felt if he was the one who had let himself go .... thanks for putting that into perspective!

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The Journey of Lucy

Kara said...

What a wonderful post. Sounds like you and your hubby have an excellent relationship!

Kelly @ Dare to be Domestic said...

Good for you for all your healthy dinner choices! And good for you for admitting this to us and yourself - not many people would be that open and that's why I love reading your blog. I'm happy he's been so supportive!!! What a great thing and Happy 30th to him!

Melissa said...

This is so sweet! What a great hubby! Mine is like that too - he encourages me in my journey of health but he has NEVER said anything negative about the FAT or lack of exercise. Such a sweetie! :) Your guy is handsome, bet y'all are a CUTE couple! Glad you made him some chiken fried steak! :)

Ty said...

Adorable. My hubby has never pointed out my flaws or how I have let myself go, thank goodness. I would probably cry for like 3 years with just one negative comment.

As for what you mentioned about if your hubby had been the one to let himself go? I'm sort of the opposite. When I met my husband he was realllllyyyyy skinny. I think skinny on small-framed guys looks "wimpy". Now that he's gained some weight I find him soooooo much more attractive. He doesn't have rolls but he's just... broader. Love it. I beg him not to lose weight. He wants to.

*Sigh* I should probably be more supportive. Thanks for the look inside!

Can do mom said...

I loved this post!

What a wonderful tribute to your beloved husband!

I hope your celebration of his birthday was full of happiness and joy.


Liz J said...

He's a good man...and I remember when we were all wee ones! :-) Please give my best to Justin and your mother-in-law

Kelly said...

Love it Keelie ! You are blessed to have such a wonderful man and I know he is blessed to have you ! Sounds like a wonderful birthday celebration :) My hubby LOVE CFS so when I cave and make it, it's such a treat for all of us.

You are such an inspiring woman, in all ways. :)

Charbelle said...

Happy Birthday to your hubby!!! What a blessing!!! Those realizations like the one you had about how he never once criticized you and how you would have acted when you thought about it... those moments of self reflection and honesty are sometimes sharp aren't they?! It's that realization that yet again we fall short and yet again God shows His grace and amazingness to us! Hope that it's another wonderful year for you both!!

Anonymous said...

I love to hear about husbands who really love their wives. The verb-love, not the sentiment-love. I'm glad you were controlled during the dinner and that you're doing your best to show love right back to your hubby!!