I was kind of embarrassed at first. How can a person go a whole year doing the types of "weight-loss-y" things that I do and not lose anything? How? Then I felt dumb. Why did I assume I had lost lots of weight? Then I felt mad that all of those months had been wasted. I could have been to goal by now. Then I felt frustrated and defeated and blah. Waaaaaah!
When I was done with all of this, I decided to do 3 things:
1) Shut Up
2) Suck it up
3) Get to Work
Here are my no-frills, once-a-month, weigh in photos for September.
169 lbs.
In my heart of hearts I know that all was not lost over the past year. Truly, I do. Quite the contrary. I know that God has been working on different areas of my life. I guess it's just a little uncomfortable because they aren't really areas I wanted him working on ;)
A statement that I read this week pretty much sums up my current state-of-mind:
I'm not what I wanna be; I'm not what I'm gonna be...But praise God Almighty, I'm not what I was.
Love that!
This is the physical comparison of where I was in October 2009 (229 lbs.) and where I am almost in October 2011 (169 lbs.).
Interesting to me that you can capture the physical comparison so well with photos but the spiritual/emotional/mental changes can not be photographed. They can not be seen, only experienced. There is not a sidebar big enough in this bloggy world to document the make-over that my heart is undergoing. So thankful.
Posts
7 comments:
Wow, you summed it up so well! I'm in the same boat. I went back to Weight Watchers the beginning of March and have lost all of 8 pounds so far. Wooo.
There's obviously unseen work going on inside.
You look fantastic!! And your outfits on the sidebar are so cute!
Those before and afters show quite a difference!
Keelie, I know exactly how you feel--only with exclamation points on the "wasted a year" part.
An excellent thing that you have done is NOT gain this year. I know you weren't trying to maintain. I know that you were on plan more days than you were not, so it stinks that the few days off-plan can neutralize the on plan days.
BUT you did not gain.
I weighed about 169 this time last year, too. Now I weigh 197 pounds. :o Yeah. See, it could be worse.
Onward and forward, girlfriend, this year ain't over yet.
Deb
You look awesome!!! And I love your attitude :)
Don't waste a day. You can do it. Don't be discouraged. Look at where you are and what you've done.
Many people treat goal weight like a destination. It is only a space of time in your journey. There are times when you can focus on weight-loss and times when something else demands your focus. Take some time and decide what you can do today to take care of yourself. No long range goals...just today. Do that and find your focus again. We all get "tired" of eating/exercising and take a break. For me...break-time is over. Time to get busy. Praying for you my sister-in-Christ. Mis
Well Keelie, we're all works in progress. I wanted to be at a different weight by now and I weigh about the same as I did a year ago too. I'm on my last 5-10 pounds, but they linger!
Don't despair and DON'T GIVE UP! You are not the same person you were a year ago and the foundation you have now will help support healthy choices in the year to come.
Blessings to you!
Keelie I absolutely love your blog and how you write truth, how you feel, how God is working in you, your frustrations, all of it. Its real and its life. And I am thankful you are letting God use you, right now, where you are.
Post a Comment