June 30, 2011
As I was reflecting on the session that we just completed, A New Beginning, I concluded that the most important skill I have been able to develop over the past year and a half is the ability to begin again. This is not the same as starting something new. (I have always been good at that!) No, beginning again means to simply pick up where you left off and continue on. I strongly believe that if you can do that, you have the "secret weapon" to weight loss.
Beginning again is not in my nature. At this very moment I could probably produce over 20 half-finished projects from my house. The walls in my kitchen have been half-way painted for months (pictured above). I'm really good at beginning things, but less good at beginning them again. As I told the group last night, the ability to begin again is from God, not me.
Getting to that place, or developing that skill, required letting go. I had to let go of a lot of hopes and dreams and expectations. The hope that this would be easy, the dream that it would be fast, and the expectation that I would never mess up. I was holding on to those things with all my might and as a result, I had no might to do the work that needed to be done. I couldn't do the work while I was just standing there trying to hold onto stuff. Beginning again requires letting go, and taking risk.
Weight-loss has been a life-long struggle for me. Like many who are probably reading this, I tried about a million different times to lose weight. Early on I would tell myself " Okay, this is it. This is the time. I'm going to do it." And then I would fail. Sooner or later I would get motivated again. I would think "Okay, now this is the time. I mean it. This is it." And then: boom! Fail. At some point I would scrape up a teeny bit of dignity and go again. I began to think more along the lines of, " Maybe this time will be the time? Who knows." Eventually I got to the point of starting these things and thinking, "I know this isn't going to stick. Why am I even doing this?" And as you guessed, I would fail those times, too.
Can anyone relate to this? If so, allow me to offer some hope. After years and years, painful years, of beginning again, the time has come. This time really is the time! What if I had given up? What if I had decided to never begin again? I would never have gotten to the the time that really is the time. No matter how silly or futile it feels, you have to begin again. Over and over and over.
Success for me has come in the form of a million "beginning agains". The only way I know to be able to begin again--over and over and over--is to keep putting my hope in something bigger than myself.
Those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength; They will soar on wings like eagles, they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. Isaiah 40:31
Don't be afraid to let go and begin again--this time might be "the time."
Posted by Keelie at 10:26 AM